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Bleach Movie 3: Fade to Black
This is not as funny, IMHO, as my Diamond Dust Rebellion writeup, because that I strung together from my main thoughts, and this I wrote from my Twitter observations, so this is more of an actual opinionated recap. I post it regardless.
The third movie begins with Mayuri making a device, which is immediately stolen, along with his memories. Amnesiac Mayuri freaks out and destroys his lab, including his computer. I envision cell doors opening and hundreds of tortured test subjects fleeing their cells in delight!
Kenpachi comes to see what the ruckus is about and gets the pleasure of being the first to fight, but the gray substance overwhelming the place is goopy and apparently paralyzing. Also gross. Seireitei gets completely drowned while a couple of captains stand nearby on a high perch and shake their heads sadly. Meanwhile, Rukia is visited by the ~*~whimsy fairy~*~ and also loses her memories.
We see a brief flash of, in order, Renji, Byakuya, Yamamoto?!, and Ichigo. I'm afraid to ask if Yamamoto and Rukia had some sort of relationship I don't know about.
Back home, Ichigo forgets Rukia, then remembers her thirty seconds later. But when he goes to ask Urahara what that was about, Urahara goes "I'm not sure if this is relevant to you forgetting about this Rukia, whoever that is, but hey, a third of Soul Society was destroyed last night?" Thanks, Urahara. You are indeed a genius, connecting these two things.
Once we're there, people attack Ichigo because none of them recognize him even the slightest, so -- I'm not sure why this happened, really. No one remembers Rukia, either, but everyone still remembers Mayuri, so that's weird. (Urahara explains this, but his explanation is stupid, and he's not allowed to be where he is when he gives the explanation, so it is invalidated.) The Soul Society has shinigami posted at the entrances. These vigilant guards apparently have a concrete plan. Is it to form an impenetrable barrier, like supposedly surrounds Seireitei to begin with? Is it perhaps to seal out external energy? Gather spiritual energy to combat it?! Their plan appears to be: the moment trouble appears, run away. Way to go, Gotei 13.
The whimsy fairy and her creepy scythe-wielding sidekick claim to be Rukia's long lost best friends. Why do all of these movies involve long lost best friends?? It's kind of sad. Everyone in Seireitei forgets everyone else all the time.
The captains have a meeting wherein they all agree that this is fucked up, but nothing we can do about it! Hitsugaya announces that he dislikes everything about this situation, including himself. Way to take a self-loathing stand, Hitsugaya, but that is not productive. Invest in self-help books.
Byakuya wanders aimlessly through the many many very empty rooms of his truly unnecessarily huge house. This is totally canon to the series. Also, we have a flashback that confirms my many suspicions that Byakuya and Hisana are the most boring couple to ever be boring.
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libekory: "Byakuya reads poetry to Hisana over her sickbed, veeeery slowly, without inflection, without expression."
Ichigo arrives to chat with Byakuya, who doesn't know him but also doesn't care. The rest of his division for some reason was hanging out on his property, so they rush over, and Byakuya tells them not to attack him, but Renji barrels in and nobody attempts to dissuade him from beating Ichigo senseless, so they agree to beat each other senseless-- which is senseless, but okay. I do like the detail that Renji, having lost his memories of Rukia (and only having had a brief flash of her before, but not really remembering) doesn't remember how to use bankai, since he achieved it for her.
Then Urahara arrives at Mayuri's cell and my suspension of disbelief dissolves and my disbelief comes crashing down, unsuspended. Urahara can't be here, guys. He was banished. Not like "If you come back we will all hate on you" banished, but like "You get physically hurt touching the door that takes you back here" banished. He addresses this with a throwaway line about how he totally could've done this anytime. Oh, of course. That makes sense.
Anyway, Urahara brought Mayuri a spare brain -- this at least is completely IC -- and then Mayuri completely vanishes from the rest of the movie, so that was apparently pointless. Meanwhile, Rukia is having flashbacks of Renji and is disoriented, but whimsy fairy and scythe boy (who are nameless) have lied to her and she knows that they're lying. This is not the movie's fault, but they attest that Rukia is over (well over) 100 years old, and that logically isn't really possible.
All the popular characters are chasing after Ichigo, who calls Hitsugaya by his given name without even a polite suffix. Poor Hitsugaya. Renji stops him from killing the crap out of Ichigo, and announces that he does so because "My brain is telling me that you're the enemy! But my gut is telling me that you're not the real enemy! STUPID GUT."
Urahara then arrives on the scene, having possibly absorbed and completely replaced Mayuri: Urahara is now wearing his haori so I guess he's the new old captain of the 12th. This invalidates this entire scene, because he can't be here. But if he had been here, he would then have started story-telling about back in the day when he was conducting horrible immoral experiments.
libekory: I made whimsy fairy and scythe boy in a lab. I did so many illegal things back then! ♥
For some reason Yamamoto is more concerned about Rukia giving her powers to a human. Nice try, crazy justice dude, but you've already tried to kill Rukia for that. Chill and don't worry about it. Urahara explains that "Your mind is like a chain of memories..." and we discover that Urahara had the ability to make Mayuri's computer work even after Mayuri sliced it up with his zanpakutou. Skillz!
It occurs to me that since everyone's forgotten everything that happened during the Soul Society arc, none of these people understand why they're short three captains.
Ichigo and Renji have taken off and Ichigo helps Renji remember Rukia in a genuinely sweet way. "You're closest to her! You've known her forever! Call out her name a thousand times until you remember!" And then Renji remembers enough to get a tad possessive, and also to reclaim his bankai, which he is proud of, and tries to brag about to Ichigo, who has seen it before, sorry.
Renji and Ichigo bust in to rescue her from the siblings who might be named Psycho and Crazy. Rukia recognizes Renji instantly, woob, and then the siblings start to freak out, finally culminating in a super creepy freakout when Rukia remembers Ichigo. They absorb her. She gains a cool new look.
FIGHTO!
-Rangiku appears out of nowhere. Oh, hey, were you in this movie? Welcome to existing!
-Yoruichi gazes fondly at Urahara kicking ass while forgetting that she is holding Soifon in her arms. The most accurate relationship depicted in this movie.
-lololol they let Kenpachi loose.
-Kenpachi really, really enjoys these movies. He gets to do so much killing!
-Ichigo fights Rukia and appears to be advocating Ichigo/Rukia/Renji, since all their souls cry out to each other. Intriguing.
-Byakuya appears out of nowhere. Oh, hey, you were in this movie! Welcome back!
-"Hitsugaya doesn't have his petals. I wonder if that's laziness or--" "Laziness." "Damnit, at least let me finish--" "Laziness."
-Kon is the person who loves Rukia the most, judging on his being the only one to refuse to give up on her.
We finally manage to kill evil Rukia, who then becomes miraculously better, but whimsy fairy and scythe boy are dying. The timeline of this movie is equally as amazingly impossible as Urahara's presence in it: apparently, when Rukia was -- around the age she was when she graduated from the academy, a hundred years ago, she was living on the streets of Rukongai, before she knew Renji. Then she met these two kids and promised to name them, but they are killed by a shinigami. It's not actually a shinigami; it's Urahara's experimental Hollow memory reaper thing possessing a shinigami. So their resentment of shinigami could have been easily resolved if anyone had remembered anything, ever.
Anyway it possesses the dead kids, and then they go to Hueco Mundo, where -- magic happens, and they become in control, but are evil? In both this movie and the last movie, Hueco Mundo is the answer to all plot holes, forever.
Rukia gives them their names, and then they die, and it suddenly starts pouring. Monsoon capital of any dimension, Seireitei. Rukia howls and howls and howls and I'm like, hey. They've been dead for a hundred years and they destroyed half of Seireitei. Give the melodrama a bit of a rest.
Ichigo and Rukia fluff at each other, including a possible cheap reference to Kaien, or else just inattentive writing. The romantic implications of this scene are ruined for me becauselibekory points out that it is very evocative of the way the last movie ended, with Hitsugaya and Ichigo fluffing at each other. Awkwaaaaard...
I think I'm going to have to say that in terms of plot, the first movie is the best, both for lack of COMPLETELY impossible things, and for actually not falling back on the "long lost best friend you forgot about" schtick. (Just the memory loss part.) Third movie is best in animation, and second movie is best... in... volume of Hitsugaya angst. I got nothing.
The third movie begins with Mayuri making a device, which is immediately stolen, along with his memories. Amnesiac Mayuri freaks out and destroys his lab, including his computer. I envision cell doors opening and hundreds of tortured test subjects fleeing their cells in delight!
Kenpachi comes to see what the ruckus is about and gets the pleasure of being the first to fight, but the gray substance overwhelming the place is goopy and apparently paralyzing. Also gross. Seireitei gets completely drowned while a couple of captains stand nearby on a high perch and shake their heads sadly. Meanwhile, Rukia is visited by the ~*~whimsy fairy~*~ and also loses her memories.
We see a brief flash of, in order, Renji, Byakuya, Yamamoto?!, and Ichigo. I'm afraid to ask if Yamamoto and Rukia had some sort of relationship I don't know about.
Back home, Ichigo forgets Rukia, then remembers her thirty seconds later. But when he goes to ask Urahara what that was about, Urahara goes "I'm not sure if this is relevant to you forgetting about this Rukia, whoever that is, but hey, a third of Soul Society was destroyed last night?" Thanks, Urahara. You are indeed a genius, connecting these two things.
Once we're there, people attack Ichigo because none of them recognize him even the slightest, so -- I'm not sure why this happened, really. No one remembers Rukia, either, but everyone still remembers Mayuri, so that's weird. (Urahara explains this, but his explanation is stupid, and he's not allowed to be where he is when he gives the explanation, so it is invalidated.) The Soul Society has shinigami posted at the entrances. These vigilant guards apparently have a concrete plan. Is it to form an impenetrable barrier, like supposedly surrounds Seireitei to begin with? Is it perhaps to seal out external energy? Gather spiritual energy to combat it?! Their plan appears to be: the moment trouble appears, run away. Way to go, Gotei 13.
The whimsy fairy and her creepy scythe-wielding sidekick claim to be Rukia's long lost best friends. Why do all of these movies involve long lost best friends?? It's kind of sad. Everyone in Seireitei forgets everyone else all the time.
The captains have a meeting wherein they all agree that this is fucked up, but nothing we can do about it! Hitsugaya announces that he dislikes everything about this situation, including himself. Way to take a self-loathing stand, Hitsugaya, but that is not productive. Invest in self-help books.
Byakuya wanders aimlessly through the many many very empty rooms of his truly unnecessarily huge house. This is totally canon to the series. Also, we have a flashback that confirms my many suspicions that Byakuya and Hisana are the most boring couple to ever be boring.
libekory: "Byakuya reads poetry to Hisana over her sickbed, veeeery slowly, without inflection, without expression."Ichigo arrives to chat with Byakuya, who doesn't know him but also doesn't care. The rest of his division for some reason was hanging out on his property, so they rush over, and Byakuya tells them not to attack him, but Renji barrels in and nobody attempts to dissuade him from beating Ichigo senseless, so they agree to beat each other senseless-- which is senseless, but okay. I do like the detail that Renji, having lost his memories of Rukia (and only having had a brief flash of her before, but not really remembering) doesn't remember how to use bankai, since he achieved it for her.
Then Urahara arrives at Mayuri's cell and my suspension of disbelief dissolves and my disbelief comes crashing down, unsuspended. Urahara can't be here, guys. He was banished. Not like "If you come back we will all hate on you" banished, but like "You get physically hurt touching the door that takes you back here" banished. He addresses this with a throwaway line about how he totally could've done this anytime. Oh, of course. That makes sense.
Anyway, Urahara brought Mayuri a spare brain -- this at least is completely IC -- and then Mayuri completely vanishes from the rest of the movie, so that was apparently pointless. Meanwhile, Rukia is having flashbacks of Renji and is disoriented, but whimsy fairy and scythe boy (who are nameless) have lied to her and she knows that they're lying. This is not the movie's fault, but they attest that Rukia is over (well over) 100 years old, and that logically isn't really possible.
All the popular characters are chasing after Ichigo, who calls Hitsugaya by his given name without even a polite suffix. Poor Hitsugaya. Renji stops him from killing the crap out of Ichigo, and announces that he does so because "My brain is telling me that you're the enemy! But my gut is telling me that you're not the real enemy! STUPID GUT."
Urahara then arrives on the scene, having possibly absorbed and completely replaced Mayuri: Urahara is now wearing his haori so I guess he's the new old captain of the 12th. This invalidates this entire scene, because he can't be here. But if he had been here, he would then have started story-telling about back in the day when he was conducting horrible immoral experiments.
libekory: I made whimsy fairy and scythe boy in a lab. I did so many illegal things back then! ♥For some reason Yamamoto is more concerned about Rukia giving her powers to a human. Nice try, crazy justice dude, but you've already tried to kill Rukia for that. Chill and don't worry about it. Urahara explains that "Your mind is like a chain of memories..." and we discover that Urahara had the ability to make Mayuri's computer work even after Mayuri sliced it up with his zanpakutou. Skillz!
It occurs to me that since everyone's forgotten everything that happened during the Soul Society arc, none of these people understand why they're short three captains.
Ichigo and Renji have taken off and Ichigo helps Renji remember Rukia in a genuinely sweet way. "You're closest to her! You've known her forever! Call out her name a thousand times until you remember!" And then Renji remembers enough to get a tad possessive, and also to reclaim his bankai, which he is proud of, and tries to brag about to Ichigo, who has seen it before, sorry.
Renji and Ichigo bust in to rescue her from the siblings who might be named Psycho and Crazy. Rukia recognizes Renji instantly, woob, and then the siblings start to freak out, finally culminating in a super creepy freakout when Rukia remembers Ichigo. They absorb her. She gains a cool new look.
FIGHTO!
-Rangiku appears out of nowhere. Oh, hey, were you in this movie? Welcome to existing!
-Yoruichi gazes fondly at Urahara kicking ass while forgetting that she is holding Soifon in her arms. The most accurate relationship depicted in this movie.
-lololol they let Kenpachi loose.
-Kenpachi really, really enjoys these movies. He gets to do so much killing!
-Ichigo fights Rukia and appears to be advocating Ichigo/Rukia/Renji, since all their souls cry out to each other. Intriguing.
-Byakuya appears out of nowhere. Oh, hey, you were in this movie! Welcome back!
-"Hitsugaya doesn't have his petals. I wonder if that's laziness or--" "Laziness." "Damnit, at least let me finish--" "Laziness."
-Kon is the person who loves Rukia the most, judging on his being the only one to refuse to give up on her.
We finally manage to kill evil Rukia, who then becomes miraculously better, but whimsy fairy and scythe boy are dying. The timeline of this movie is equally as amazingly impossible as Urahara's presence in it: apparently, when Rukia was -- around the age she was when she graduated from the academy, a hundred years ago, she was living on the streets of Rukongai, before she knew Renji. Then she met these two kids and promised to name them, but they are killed by a shinigami. It's not actually a shinigami; it's Urahara's experimental Hollow memory reaper thing possessing a shinigami. So their resentment of shinigami could have been easily resolved if anyone had remembered anything, ever.
Anyway it possesses the dead kids, and then they go to Hueco Mundo, where -- magic happens, and they become in control, but are evil? In both this movie and the last movie, Hueco Mundo is the answer to all plot holes, forever.
Rukia gives them their names, and then they die, and it suddenly starts pouring. Monsoon capital of any dimension, Seireitei. Rukia howls and howls and howls and I'm like, hey. They've been dead for a hundred years and they destroyed half of Seireitei. Give the melodrama a bit of a rest.
Ichigo and Rukia fluff at each other, including a possible cheap reference to Kaien, or else just inattentive writing. The romantic implications of this scene are ruined for me because
libekory points out that it is very evocative of the way the last movie ended, with Hitsugaya and Ichigo fluffing at each other. Awkwaaaaard...I think I'm going to have to say that in terms of plot, the first movie is the best, both for lack of COMPLETELY impossible things, and for actually not falling back on the "long lost best friend you forgot about" schtick. (Just the memory loss part.) Third movie is best in animation, and second movie is best... in... volume of Hitsugaya angst. I got nothing.