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Bleach 2: Son of Bleach
Every now and then I randomly get to thinking in terms of generations. I think, "Does so-and-so want kids? What kind of kids would this guy and this chick have?"
For Bleach, that time is now.
Ichigo/Rukia: They have one kid, and argue so much over how to raise him that they don't have any more.
Ichigo/Orihime: Everyone I've seen give Ichigo children seems to think he'd have exclusively girls. I defy this idea. Their firstborn is definitely male. (After all, he has to protect the siblings who come after him.) I believe I've said before that they will have a host of adorable orange-haired, semi-retarded children.
Renji/Rukia: Out of concerns for Rukia's health, they don't have kids, until Ichigo jeers about her feminine shortcomings, and to spite him, she swears that she will have more kids than he does if it kills her. Ichigo tells Orihime that whoever has the most kids wins and the two couples are off.
Ishida: Despite reservations based on his own family experiences, he has one child, to carry on the Quincy legacy. He is secretly disappointed that no one invited him to take part in the spawn war, just so that he could have the opportunity to refuse with dignity.
Chad: Wants one (1) child, perhaps a daughter. Is quietly very glad that he feels no obligation to repopulate the Earth, unlike his friends.
Urahara/Yoruichi: They don't want kids, but Soifon wants Yoruichito give her babies to have children that can be heir to the Shihouin clan. Despite her raging hate-on for Urahara, Soifon sends out her ninja to sabotage their efforts at birth control, but is foiled every time. Even attempting to enlist Urahara's help is met with cheerful compliance, but he then proceeds to not even go near Yoruichi for months.
Aizen: Who needs kids? Even if there was a woman who could compare to his awesome, he's already raised about eight thousand shinigami and half as many Arrancar. This last batch is the one that's going to get him a cushy deity job so that he can retire.
Gin: No way. Who would be crazy enough to let him near children anyway? Wonderwice also seems to think he'd make a very bad mommy.
Kira: They say that masculine men have only daughters. If he gets married, Kira is doomed to nothing but boys, whoever the lucky (?) lady.
Hitsugaya/Hinamori: [Because any boys they had would be little monsters like he was as a kid,] They have one daughter, who inherits her mother's oblivious popularity with boys. Hitsugaya proceeds to spend the next several centuries terrorizing every male in the vicinity, and also Rangiku.
Rangiku: Doesn't want kids -- what about her figure? She'll be happy to corrupt her captain's spawn when he's not looking.
Iba: Wants a dozen kids, is disappointed Rangiku isn't willing to bear them.
Shuuhei: Doesn't want kids, but is still disappointed because Rangiku isn't going to hook up with him either.
Ikkaku: Kids? What do you mean, kids? They're just going to be in the way, if you ask him.
Yumichika: Kids? *blush* What about his figure? He says this to confuse people and disgust his captain.
Yachiru: Even if she wanted to reproduce, and child-rearing doesn't seem to be her idea of a good time (Yachiru's idea of a good time: watching Ken-chan fight, giving out incorrect yet irresistible directions, driving everyone in the vicinity crazy), no one would let her. She's bad enough as it is.
Byakuya: He isn't interested in getting married again, but he will attempt to borrow one of Renji and Rukia's sons to cultivate into something vaguely respectable. Unfortunately, between Renji's genes and Rukia's, they have no respectable children.
Kyouraku: Insists that he wants ten kids, all by Nanao-chan preferably ♥ but secretly he doesn't care if he has any or not.
Nanao: Insists that she doesn't want any kids, but secretly thinks a little girl with her captain's hair would be adorable.
Ukitake: Loves kids, but is too worried about his condition and his health to want to raise a child who would suffer for his decision. Instead will shamelessly spoil Rukia's and Hitsugaya's children.
Sentarou/Kiyone: Argue for ages about who will get to have Ukitake's children, then realize that it'd be easiest to do it themselves -- but then how would it be Ukitake's? D:
Come partake of the crack.
For Bleach, that time is now.
Ichigo/Rukia: They have one kid, and argue so much over how to raise him that they don't have any more.
Ichigo/Orihime: Everyone I've seen give Ichigo children seems to think he'd have exclusively girls. I defy this idea. Their firstborn is definitely male. (After all, he has to protect the siblings who come after him.) I believe I've said before that they will have a host of adorable orange-haired, semi-retarded children.
Renji/Rukia: Out of concerns for Rukia's health, they don't have kids, until Ichigo jeers about her feminine shortcomings, and to spite him, she swears that she will have more kids than he does if it kills her. Ichigo tells Orihime that whoever has the most kids wins and the two couples are off.
Ishida: Despite reservations based on his own family experiences, he has one child, to carry on the Quincy legacy. He is secretly disappointed that no one invited him to take part in the spawn war, just so that he could have the opportunity to refuse with dignity.
Chad: Wants one (1) child, perhaps a daughter. Is quietly very glad that he feels no obligation to repopulate the Earth, unlike his friends.
Urahara/Yoruichi: They don't want kids, but Soifon wants Yoruichi
Aizen: Who needs kids? Even if there was a woman who could compare to his awesome, he's already raised about eight thousand shinigami and half as many Arrancar. This last batch is the one that's going to get him a cushy deity job so that he can retire.
Gin: No way. Who would be crazy enough to let him near children anyway? Wonderwice also seems to think he'd make a very bad mommy.
Kira: They say that masculine men have only daughters. If he gets married, Kira is doomed to nothing but boys, whoever the lucky (?) lady.
Hitsugaya/Hinamori: [Because any boys they had would be little monsters like he was as a kid,] They have one daughter, who inherits her mother's oblivious popularity with boys. Hitsugaya proceeds to spend the next several centuries terrorizing every male in the vicinity, and also Rangiku.
Rangiku: Doesn't want kids -- what about her figure? She'll be happy to corrupt her captain's spawn when he's not looking.
Iba: Wants a dozen kids, is disappointed Rangiku isn't willing to bear them.
Shuuhei: Doesn't want kids, but is still disappointed because Rangiku isn't going to hook up with him either.
Ikkaku: Kids? What do you mean, kids? They're just going to be in the way, if you ask him.
Yumichika: Kids? *blush* What about his figure? He says this to confuse people and disgust his captain.
Yachiru: Even if she wanted to reproduce, and child-rearing doesn't seem to be her idea of a good time (Yachiru's idea of a good time: watching Ken-chan fight, giving out incorrect yet irresistible directions, driving everyone in the vicinity crazy), no one would let her. She's bad enough as it is.
Byakuya: He isn't interested in getting married again, but he will attempt to borrow one of Renji and Rukia's sons to cultivate into something vaguely respectable. Unfortunately, between Renji's genes and Rukia's, they have no respectable children.
Kyouraku: Insists that he wants ten kids, all by Nanao-chan preferably ♥ but secretly he doesn't care if he has any or not.
Nanao: Insists that she doesn't want any kids, but secretly thinks a little girl with her captain's hair would be adorable.
Ukitake: Loves kids, but is too worried about his condition and his health to want to raise a child who would suffer for his decision. Instead will shamelessly spoil Rukia's and Hitsugaya's children.
Sentarou/Kiyone: Argue for ages about who will get to have Ukitake's children, then realize that it'd be easiest to do it themselves -- but then how would it be Ukitake's? D:
Come partake of the crack.
no subject
If any of those has a chance of happening, THIS is it. XDDDDDDD
And the baby war... because they're that dumb. Oh Ishida. XD
no subject
I've recently taken to the idea of Kira/Kiyone, though. It's my own fault.