Whyyyyy?

[sincere]

I am Princess Meredith, heir to a throne--if I can stay alive long enough to claim it. My cousin, Prince Cel, is determined to see that I don't. As long as we both live, we are in a race for the crown: Whichever one of us reproduces first gets the throne. So now the men of my royal guard--frightening warriors skilled with blade, spell, and gun--have become my lovers, auditioning with pleasure for the role of future king and father of my child. And they must still protect me from assassination attempts--for unlike most of the fey, I am part human, and very mortal. All this royal back-stabbing makes it very difficult for me to pursue my living as a private investigator in Los Angeles [...]

This is a summary. From a book.

An actual book.