![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
THE MK VERSION ZOMG
Because ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
that_oneill_guy wanted to see it and it wouldn't exactly fit in a comment.
First, write down the names of 12 characters. Then read and answer the questions. You can't look at the questions (or click on the cut) until you write down the 12 characters you're going to use.
1. Zero
2. Erts
3. Hiead
4. Kizna
5. Ikhny
6. Azuma
7. Dr. C ((<--MISTAKE))
8. Rioroute
9. Phil-Phleira
10. Yu
11. Teela
12. Wrecka
1.) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
AN AZUMA/TEELA FIC. I can genuinely say I haven't. This is one fan-configuration that has never been attempted, I believe. With that said, it might not actually be all that bad, especially if it was a sort of unrequited thing on Azuma's part, I guess. Teela, of course, is as usual immune to normalness.
2.) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Kizna is totally hot. She's gorgeous, girly, tough, and adorable. You know you would do Kizna. If that's the way you swing. I mean, I'm not here to pass judgment.
3.) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
OH GOD, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW HOW THAT HAPPENS. But, um, I imagine first that Rio would be in a shitload of trouble because I doubt a pregnant pilot would be an asset. Or necessarily functional. Secondly, I... I honestly can't envision Wrecka involved in this scenario at all. How did she get here??
4.) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
There are FICS about PHIL?? Um, well, I guess my Repairerfic, although frankly it's not that great. ...if there are any good Rio/Phil fics, that'd be cool.
5.) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Erts, and... and AZUMA? *dies of laughter* Oh god, oh man. That's so wrong, so totally not going to happen, of course they wouldn't.
So that was my first reaction. Then I thought about it for a bit and realized that actually there's no reason they wouldn't be a good couple. Azuma is a huge amount like Zero in all the places where he might rub Erts the wrong way, and a good deal more tactful when he wants to be. So now I'm disturbed.
6.) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
THEY ARE BOTH SO WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS. LIES. Ikhny/Phil versus Ikhny/Yu?! Oh god. There are -- there aren't even WORDS to describe why both of those relationships would be fundamentally painful and wrong, but um, I think Ikhny would never appeal to either of them. She's too frail and spineless to interest Yu, who likes frail and strong *kofkofKazuhi*, and Phil... Phil would just be disgusted with her. If she were ever in a relationship with either of them she would wither and die.
7.) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
Okay, its individual components:
-What are Wrecka and Erts doing having sex?! Wouldn't she like, poison him??
-What is Dr. C doing waltzing around in his students' private quarters on GOA??
So I'm going to guess the universe implodes.
8.) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
...a Hiead/Yu fic...?
...
Okay. Um. "In the near future, after [insert plot device here], Yu is unable to pilot the Goddess for Crazy Fuckers any longer, and is replaced by Hiead. But he just can't let go of the past, and with the shared bond of their Goddess between--" oh god, I can't continue. "Rated PG-13 because ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENS."
9.) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Horrifyingly, and I mean soul-crushingly horrifyingly, I know that there is indeed Zero/Rio fluff out there.
10.) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
AAAAAAAAARGH. Dr. C... Wrecka... AAAAAAAAAARGH.
"Comfort Comes From The Strangest Damn Places."
AAAAAAAAARGH.
11.) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
I would never, ever want that to happen. But if for some reason Kizna had to molest Zero (a virginal Zero, oh god the horror) I guess the plot device I would use would be... ... ...um, I can't really picture Zero getting deflowered in any sense of the word. So I'm going to rewrite the questions as "What kind of plot device would you use if someone held a gun to your head and forced you to write Zero's first time with Kizna?"
In that case maybe, like, one of those horrible love potion plots, where like, the character is so turned on and horny that if he doesn't have sex he DIES. Then Kizna sacrifices herself in the most horrible sense for the boy she loves like a brother. Then, in the aftermath, Erts heals all Zero's lingering trauma, and it is Touching.
12.) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
SLASH WITH DR. C??
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? WITH WHOM WOULD YOU DO THAT? Oh god the dirty dirty dirty.
And what would he want with a guy ANYWAY when he has TEELA? Pfft.
13.) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
I have the depressing feeling some of them do. Please, speak up so I can defriend you. :P Hiead should not have sex with anyone. EVER. *she said, ignoring the hiead/wrecka fanfic she had once entertained*
14.) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Teela? Actually,narichan draws her every now and again.
15.) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Erts/Kizna/Ikhny? ...no. No they wouldn't. And if any of you would, don't tell me. I don't have the resources to send assassins to your house just yet.
16.) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
...but... Yu doesn't scream. Depending on what the moment of great passion is, I miiiiiight be able to stretch my imagination to see him screaming, "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SISTER" but I doubt it. In a traditional moment of great passion, he might choke something out quietly. Like his sister's name. IT'S NOT MY INCEST, IT'S CANON, OKAY?
17.) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
A songfic about Rioroute? ...A Weird Al song about food, like "Eat It" or "I Love Rocky Road" or something.
18.) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Warning: Zero/Azuma/Wrecka fanfiction is not for anyone and may induce nightmares, stomach cramps, hallucinations, and/or mild psychosis. Please consult your doctor before reading.
19.) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Erts would say, "You know, Hikura-san, the haze of intolerance hovering about you is terribly interesting. Please excuse me while I edge for the door."
20.) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
I think the last time I personally read a fic about Ikhny was when I WROTE that one about Ikhny and Zero. I'm sure most of the Ikhny fics out there are horrible Hiead/Ikhny fanfics anyway.
21.) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
I bet Azuma likes dirty talk. Or bondage. I'm a horrible person.
22.) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Teela and Phil? ...meh. I guess she could. For some reason I could tolerate it. Teela doesn't get drunk so she'd be doing the seducing cold sober, but Phil would ideally be very out there, drunk, stoned, something.
23.) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
HIEAD AND DR. C AAAAARGH MY EYEBALLS ARE MELTING.
I guess Hiead though? AAAAAARGH. *weeping*
24.) "One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
Read: Zero and Phil are in a happy relationship until Phil suddenly runs off with Kizna. Zero, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Teela and a brief unhappy affair with Wrecka, then follows the wise advice of Ikhny and finds true love with Hiead.
For some reason, I am totally unsurprised that in the end it turns out to be a Zero/Hiead fanfic. It's that kind of horrible. I think Flowery/Edith Winner should write it, it sounds right up her alley. It would be called "Inevitible" (sic) and feature lots of terribly OOC author-character chat both before and after the fic itself.
No one would read it, but Flowery's cronies would post about how wonderful it was and how cute Zero and Hiead are as a couple, but they would misspell Hiead's name.
25.) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH.
DR. C AND RIO??
I WOULD STAB MYSELF IN THE FACE.
The end.
that_oneill_guy wanted to see it and it wouldn't exactly fit in a comment.First, write down the names of 12 characters. Then read and answer the questions. You can't look at the questions (or click on the cut) until you write down the 12 characters you're going to use.
1. Zero
2. Erts
3. Hiead
4. Kizna
5. Ikhny
6. Azuma
7. Dr. C ((<--MISTAKE))
8. Rioroute
9. Phil-Phleira
10. Yu
11. Teela
12. Wrecka
1.) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
AN AZUMA/TEELA FIC. I can genuinely say I haven't. This is one fan-configuration that has never been attempted, I believe. With that said, it might not actually be all that bad, especially if it was a sort of unrequited thing on Azuma's part, I guess. Teela, of course, is as usual immune to normalness.
2.) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Kizna is totally hot. She's gorgeous, girly, tough, and adorable. You know you would do Kizna. If that's the way you swing. I mean, I'm not here to pass judgment.
3.) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
OH GOD, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW HOW THAT HAPPENS. But, um, I imagine first that Rio would be in a shitload of trouble because I doubt a pregnant pilot would be an asset. Or necessarily functional. Secondly, I... I honestly can't envision Wrecka involved in this scenario at all. How did she get here??
4.) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
There are FICS about PHIL?? Um, well, I guess my Repairerfic, although frankly it's not that great. ...if there are any good Rio/Phil fics, that'd be cool.
5.) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Erts, and... and AZUMA? *dies of laughter* Oh god, oh man. That's so wrong, so totally not going to happen, of course they wouldn't.
So that was my first reaction. Then I thought about it for a bit and realized that actually there's no reason they wouldn't be a good couple. Azuma is a huge amount like Zero in all the places where he might rub Erts the wrong way, and a good deal more tactful when he wants to be. So now I'm disturbed.
6.) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
THEY ARE BOTH SO WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS. LIES. Ikhny/Phil versus Ikhny/Yu?! Oh god. There are -- there aren't even WORDS to describe why both of those relationships would be fundamentally painful and wrong, but um, I think Ikhny would never appeal to either of them. She's too frail and spineless to interest Yu, who likes frail and strong *kofkofKazuhi*, and Phil... Phil would just be disgusted with her. If she were ever in a relationship with either of them she would wither and die.
7.) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
Okay, its individual components:
-What are Wrecka and Erts doing having sex?! Wouldn't she like, poison him??
-What is Dr. C doing waltzing around in his students' private quarters on GOA??
So I'm going to guess the universe implodes.
8.) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
...a Hiead/Yu fic...?
...
Okay. Um. "In the near future, after [insert plot device here], Yu is unable to pilot the Goddess for Crazy Fuckers any longer, and is replaced by Hiead. But he just can't let go of the past, and with the shared bond of their Goddess between--" oh god, I can't continue. "Rated PG-13 because ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENS."
9.) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Horrifyingly, and I mean soul-crushingly horrifyingly, I know that there is indeed Zero/Rio fluff out there.
10.) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
AAAAAAAAARGH. Dr. C... Wrecka... AAAAAAAAAARGH.
"Comfort Comes From The Strangest Damn Places."
AAAAAAAAARGH.
11.) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
I would never, ever want that to happen. But if for some reason Kizna had to molest Zero (a virginal Zero, oh god the horror) I guess the plot device I would use would be... ... ...um, I can't really picture Zero getting deflowered in any sense of the word. So I'm going to rewrite the questions as "What kind of plot device would you use if someone held a gun to your head and forced you to write Zero's first time with Kizna?"
In that case maybe, like, one of those horrible love potion plots, where like, the character is so turned on and horny that if he doesn't have sex he DIES. Then Kizna sacrifices herself in the most horrible sense for the boy she loves like a brother. Then, in the aftermath, Erts heals all Zero's lingering trauma, and it is Touching.
12.) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
SLASH WITH DR. C??
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? WITH WHOM WOULD YOU DO THAT? Oh god the dirty dirty dirty.
And what would he want with a guy ANYWAY when he has TEELA? Pfft.
13.) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
I have the depressing feeling some of them do. Please, speak up so I can defriend you. :P Hiead should not have sex with anyone. EVER. *she said, ignoring the hiead/wrecka fanfic she had once entertained*
14.) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Teela? Actually,
narichan draws her every now and again.15.) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Erts/Kizna/Ikhny? ...no. No they wouldn't. And if any of you would, don't tell me. I don't have the resources to send assassins to your house just yet.
16.) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
...but... Yu doesn't scream. Depending on what the moment of great passion is, I miiiiiight be able to stretch my imagination to see him screaming, "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SISTER" but I doubt it. In a traditional moment of great passion, he might choke something out quietly. Like his sister's name. IT'S NOT MY INCEST, IT'S CANON, OKAY?
17.) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
A songfic about Rioroute? ...A Weird Al song about food, like "Eat It" or "I Love Rocky Road" or something.
18.) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Warning: Zero/Azuma/Wrecka fanfiction is not for anyone and may induce nightmares, stomach cramps, hallucinations, and/or mild psychosis. Please consult your doctor before reading.
19.) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Erts would say, "You know, Hikura-san, the haze of intolerance hovering about you is terribly interesting. Please excuse me while I edge for the door."
20.) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
I think the last time I personally read a fic about Ikhny was when I WROTE that one about Ikhny and Zero. I'm sure most of the Ikhny fics out there are horrible Hiead/Ikhny fanfics anyway.
21.) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
I bet Azuma likes dirty talk. Or bondage. I'm a horrible person.
22.) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Teela and Phil? ...meh. I guess she could. For some reason I could tolerate it. Teela doesn't get drunk so she'd be doing the seducing cold sober, but Phil would ideally be very out there, drunk, stoned, something.
23.) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
HIEAD AND DR. C AAAAARGH MY EYEBALLS ARE MELTING.
I guess Hiead though? AAAAAARGH. *weeping*
24.) "One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
Read: Zero and Phil are in a happy relationship until Phil suddenly runs off with Kizna. Zero, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Teela and a brief unhappy affair with Wrecka, then follows the wise advice of Ikhny and finds true love with Hiead.
For some reason, I am totally unsurprised that in the end it turns out to be a Zero/Hiead fanfic. It's that kind of horrible. I think Flowery/Edith Winner should write it, it sounds right up her alley. It would be called "Inevitible" (sic) and feature lots of terribly OOC author-character chat both before and after the fic itself.
No one would read it, but Flowery's cronies would post about how wonderful it was and how cute Zero and Hiead are as a couple, but they would misspell Hiead's name.
25.) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH.
DR. C AND RIO??
I WOULD STAB MYSELF IN THE FACE.
The end.
no subject
It was such a glaring, huge, ultrasupermega mistake to put Dr. C on that list. XD
Re: Q24, have you ever read any of Flowery's writing? XD I wrote this MST to one of her pieces, read it and tell me you don't think that fulfills the "summary" in Q24.
http://www.deadjournal.com/users/wreckachan/4725.html
http://www.deadjournal.com/users/wreckachan/4877.html
no subject
Re: Flowery, nope, never read her before. And I'm very grateful for that because I KNOW I wouldn't have been able to handle her without your Pilots. I'd go through it in detail, telling you each bit that made me go XDDD, but LJ has this comment limit thing. However, I have to single out Garu's "wild boar" comparison because, dude. And the way Rio keeps defending Phil (AS HE SHOULD). And Yu, whenever Kazuhi comes up. And . . . wait.
. . . damn. Still, though, about the only thing your humor couldn't save me from was the HOLY FUCK RANDOM HIEAD/ERTS AND ALMOST HIEAD/ZERO AT THE END WHY?! But Teela and Garu came awfully close.
I've missed seeing fic from you, so thanks for pointing this out!
no subject
no subject
Flowery is... a nightmare. XD It's actively DIFFICULT to MST something when it's that cohesively bad. And she wrote SO MUCH. And she's one of those authors I really hate even before you take the badness into account: she used to write exclusively Hiead/Erts *spasms of horror* but then when the fandom became "popular" she switched to Hiead/Zero because that's what everyone else was writing.
GOD WHY.
"being touched by Hiead is the telepathic equivalent of being fucked by a wild boar"... It's so accurate! XD