Deliberation! The sinkhole of creativity

[sincere]

I keep worrying so much about RP. I'm losing my drive for it while at the same time I want even more of it. Like, I can't finish a thread with Fran or Bookman at Wasteland, I'm not even looking at the big open log at absolute_hold even though both Cissnei and Allen were supposed to go, but I want to app more people. I want to play Aerith somewhere! And Orihime!

But then I keep worrying. I enjoy the idea of playing a KH!Aerith in a game with Zack (and Poison Ivy), so Wasteland. But the Zack player is everywhere, so I worry if I can't keep up, she'd get left behind and he wouldn't keep at it; if he isn't going to keep after her (and he should, *sobs over the last fifteen minutes of crisis core*) then maybe I should instead app a properly FF!Aerith, even though it'd be less fun. But the last time I tugged on the mun's sleeve to talk to him about it, he never responded to my IM...

Then I want to be Orihime, despite the fact that there's no Bleach cast at WL, because she's so fun and has so many beautiful icons. And then I think, really? Allen, Peony, Orihime, Aerith? I'm just going to be that girl who plays a million shades of nice, humanitarian people? Maybe I should play a villain. Someone who's just bad. Or even someone who's just tsundere like Asch or something. (Maybe if the Dist player gets in and that person who reserved Luke ever apps.) I feel pretty bad about having only protagonists. XD I mean, I go, "I'd like to play Yuri or Flynn or Estelle or," and then I'm like oh god more good moral types.

I could app Orihime at AT, but I'm hardly paying attention to AT right now -- logging tests my distracted inspirationless groove, even though I really need to get them in there -- and the only Bleach cast there are shinigami and villains, which is in my opinion more awkward than having no cast at all.

What villains do I like and could work with in a setting like Wasteland? Not really Aizen or Marluxia, although I don't want to play the latter anymore anyway: it's hard to play them "powerless", out of control. Maybe Mithos. Mithos could be fun...

And then of course there's the fact that I have zero writing mojo. Whyyyyy.

Comments

[haruhara.livejournal.com]

I have that problem. I don't think my general character range varies too much. I mean, most of the time I pick loud, will annoy you somehow, kind of characters but I am comfortable with them, and I like them! So I'm least likely to drop.

If you do play a villain, think about whether you'd really have fun with said villain or not. :x Who knooows, you might really connect (like me with Kafuka Fuura from SZS) but at the same time, you might not.

[soi.livejournal.com]

God I'm the same with RP right now, I keep wanting to app more characters but I can't get myself to even look at most of my games. I can do fine with commenting, but when it comes to things I have to put a lot of thought into like logs or journal posts, I'm just like FFFFF MAYBE LATER. I don't know what my problem is.

I do think I play a good range of character types now, at least! TOO BAD I WON'T GET OFF MY ASS AND ACTUALLY PLAY ANY OF THEM.

[incandescens]

You could come and play Orihime on touchedthesky -- admittedly a small cast, but a good one!

(some bias may be evident here)

(I realise this is not much help)

[puddingtreat.livejournal.com]

I have the opposite. :/ It seems I only stick with villians or at least massive ass-holes. :/ I'm trying to branch out, but there's the thing about finding a character I 'connect' with enough.

[continuum.livejournal.com]

I have that problem, too, although the thing is I have tried to branch out with characters like Wash or Wolfram, and the character just wouldn't click with me and I'd then I'd have to drop. And then I feel really bad. @_@

Ultimately, I seem to end up with either the snarky badass or the tortured protagonist with a dark side that borders on making them an antihero, if not one altogether. DX;;

[p-sky.livejournal.com]

*sigh* This. So much.

I even have a reserve out for Kobato but ughhhh I can't write the app. And I keep feeling incredibly fail with all my muses though I feel satisfied when I'm actually commenting. I mean it's not that it isn't fun but... *sigh* I need to get my priorities straight =|

I also keep playing all those 'cute' characters, and I want to play someone who isn't cute for once, but I fail at making things NOT cute because if they're not cute they are ANGSTY. UGH WHY D=

/ranty rant that is actually spam

[avertuneiro.livejournal.com]

I have exactly the same problem. Though I've never played in a public RP before, it was mostly private RPGs with a few friends and we'd pick which characters we wanted to play. I either always play the happy, clueless types or the snobby, smirky ones.

Or, you know. The 'CRAWWWWWLING IN MY SKIINNN' types. But I digress.

I think it's fun to play outside the typical types we usually play for, though. It's challenging and it makes studying a different type of character all the more fun.

Perhaps, for now, you shouldn't try and stretch yourself out too much? I've had that problem before wherein there were five threads going at once and all of them were waiting on MY characters to respond to. Which... really wasn't fun because I was stuck.