sincere | Fire Emblem: Three Houses LIVEBLOG

Okay, tbh I was too impatient last night at 11PM when I finished Persona 5, so even though it's crazy, I put in 3H to play just a little, and I could barely read anything. At the time I couldn't tell if it was because my TV was too small, or because my eyes were all teary and swollen because of stupid P5.

I guess it's just the way this game is, though. Imma have to move my TV closer.

Now the TV is three feet in front of my face. CAN'T LOSE

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"Imperial Year 91", some plains, somewhere. It's a Fire Emblem war! Fliers and cavalry and infantry, oh my! Some grizzly old gladiator comes crashing down out of the sky in a flamesplosion and busts through one of the armies, heading for a thoroughly impassive green-haired woman called Lady Seiros. Once enough of her soldiers are dead, she goes for him.

They fight with swords, and her pretty outfit gets all dirty as she tries to gain the upperhand. Her boots are open-toed. I don't think that's recommended for armor. Imagine how much mud is getting inside her boots if it's splashing up with every step she takes?? Urghh.

Um, it turns out the dude has a Renji sword, and Seiros uses its whippiness to catch it around her sword, disarm him, and then runs over to punch him in the fucking face. lol, amazing

Once she knocks him down she tackles him and says, "HEY, NEMESIS. REMEMBER THE RED CANYON??"

Then she stabs him a WHOLE BUNCH while screaming.

When she regains some semblance of sanity, she goes over to his sword, picks it up, and presses its bloody blade against her face.

"I DID IT, MOM"

Oh boy.

Let's rewind. Or fast forward. Or do something involving some swirly rainbow bokeh.

In some dark place somewhere, a little girl is asleep. It's Sothis: Girl On The Throne! She is woken up and grumpily asks the protagonist to approach her. I am playing a Lady Byleth, despite her exposed belly. I'm going to try to ignore it.

Byleth was born on the 29th day of Verdant Rain Moon, just like me, and also apparently just like Sothis. What a coincidence!

Sothis goes back to sleep, which is great, because Byleth is about to wake up.

So, last night I played the game with the Japanese audio, but this cutscene convinced me to switch to English. Unless the voice acting is bad, I'll probably stick with this. The reasons are 1) they edited the mouth movements to match the English voice acting, and 2) the dialogue is localized, not strictly translated, meaning that what the Japanese voice actor says does not always match up with what the English voice actor says. These are both totally normal things that I would expect of a major game production, but it was a little jarring for me.

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A dude named Jeralt wakes Byleth up. She's had this dream often enough that he already knows all about it, but he tells her to get her head on straight, we're mercenaries and we're on the move! So, okay. He likes that, I got an affection up indicator!!

He's interrupted in his plans because three young soldier-types have suddenly busted in and they're asking for help. They were attacked by bandits.

It's kind of hard to not help, since the bandits are on top of the village we're staying in already, so... let's have a tutorial battle!

Kyaa!!! The tiny 8-bit character sprite of Byleth on the load screen!!

After his defeat, the head bandit gets back up and suddenly rushes for Edelgard. Byleth lunges between them to push Edelgard out of the way, and then--

And then Byleth is back in the dark room with the throne, and Sothis is pissed off.

SOTHIS: Are you trying to get me killed?

...Sothis is a passenger in Byleth?

She introduces herself for the first time as Sothis, aka "The Beginning", and then muses that lol she had forgotten all of that until just now. She is a mystery wrapped in an enigma.

Anyhoozle, Byleth was going to die, but Sothis stopped time. It takes her a moment to puzzle over what to do next, before triumphantly concluding that she should rewind time!

I mean... if you can do that, that'd be great, sure.

SOTHIS: Now go... You, who bears the flames within.

I'm genuinely not sure if that grammar is correct or not. So Byleth goes gets rewound to the moment when the bad guy gets back up, and this time when he goes for Edelgard, she knows to be prepared.

JERALT: Did you just...?

I guess he noticed something about what just happened was weird. But the Knights of Seiros (the crazy lady with the stabbing) have arrived to protect their students, and their leader, Alois, recognizes Jeralt! He starts to fawn over his old captain, who tries and almost succeeds in convincing him to just go on about his business.

Jeralt resigns himself to being dragged back to Garreg Mach Monastery.

ALOIS: And how about you, kid? Are you the captain's child?

Am I??? Apparently! Byleth has one "yes" answer and two joke answers. I would never have guessed. You two do not look alike. Anyway, Alois cheerfully invites her along to the monastery with them, and Sothis agrees in Byleth's head that that sounds fun.

The trio of lords converge on Byleth the moment she is clear of the adults, then start bickering. They are freaking adorable.

Edelgard: This is all your fault, Claude
Claude: Yep. Although really, it's your fault for following me when I ran away
Dimitri: ...and here I thought you were being a decoy
Edelgard: You are TOO NAIVE TO RULE.
Dimitri: Maybe you are too SUSPICIOUS to rule.
Claude: I'm so sick of this argument. You're both naive!
Edelgard: EXCUSE ME?

Dimitri: AHEM...
Dimitri: Byleth, I am deeply impressed with the way you fought. I really admire--
Edelgard: Join the Empire and fight for us
Dimitri: Dude I was going to invite her to fight for the Kingdom
Edelgard: TOO SLOW!
Claude: Wow, I was going to wait until we got all the way to the monastery before begging her to help the Alliance, but okay, sure, let's do this now

Byleth is the prettiest girl at the ball

PART 1: WHITE CLOUDS. GREAT TREE MOON. THREE HOUSES.

Each of those is read aloud by the voiceover. I am not sure... which of those is the title of this part. "Great Tree Moon" is probably a month, but why say "Three Houses"?

An illustrated sequence tells me that Fodlan has three ruling powers: The Adrestian Empire where Edelgard is from, the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus where Dimitri is from, and a league of nobles called the Leicester Alliance, where Claude is from.

Then an anime sequence briefly goes over the cast at the monastery. The only thing that jumps out at me is a teacher who walks like no human has ever walked. As we enter the premises, Jeralt looks up at the balcony above and murmurs, "Rhea's here."

She looks like Seiros!

Most Fodlan civilians follow the teachings of Seiros, and Lady Rhea is their archbishop. Speaking of Rhea, she and her minion Seteth enter to chat with us. During this conversation, Jeralt says that Byleth was born "many years after I left this place," but Alois told us he disappeared 20 years ago, so if both of these statements are true, Byleth is like 13 or something. Anyway, her mom's dead.

Rhea thanks Byleth for saving the students of the Officers Academy. She asks Jeralt to rejoin the Knights of Seiros, and he reluctantly concedes.

Then, offscreen, someone tells Jeralt that also, they want Byleth to be a professor here, so Jeralt tells Byleth.

That seems like a conversation that someone maybe should've had...... with Byleth present, idk? Maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but I feel like Rhea could've mentioned that when she was giving Jeralt his job.

Some professors immediately jump out of the woodwork to check out the new professor. They assume it's Jeralt, because Byleth is 13, but he corrects them and then leaves her to chat with her new peers. But first, he warns her to be wary of Rhea -- making her a professor seems weird. No kidding! The thirdhand way she did it is weird, too!

The professors are Hanneman, a Crest fanboy, and Manuela, the teacher with the absurd walk, who casually works the fact that she's single into her introduction. Keep it in your skirt slits, lady.

They explain to Byleth that she'll be mentoring one house in particular: there are three Houses (GASP! THAT'S THE NAME OF THE GAME!) and each is affiliated with one of the countries, where most of its students are from.

Black Eagle House = Adrestian Empire = Edelgard, Imperial princess, heir
Blue Lion House = Holy Kingdom of Faergus = Dimitri, prince, heir
Golden Deer House = Leicester Alliance = Claude, grandson of the Alliance's sovereign duke

What a coincidence that they're all the same age and they're all here at the Academy! Anyway, go meet all of them. No one knows you're a professor yet.

Meanwhile, elsewhere, Seteth is pretty annoyed that Rhea made Byleth a professor offscreen.

Seteth: Making a stranger a professor is crazy
Seteth: And she's only 13

But she's Jeralt's daughter, so it's all good! That doesn't reassure Seteth either, given that Jeralt "went missing after the great fire 21 years ago".

They continue to hold their respective opinions about this decision until the scene ends.

There's a pretty random calico cat here in the middle of the monastery floor

I want it

Gasp!! There are MANY pretty random cats at the monastery!!

Whatever the teachings of Seiros are, if they encourage random cats, I approve.

INTRODUCTIONS.

Edelgard von Hresvelg offers to tell us about each of the Black Eagles and there's a fancy scene for it and everything. LET'S MEET OUR CAST!

Edelgard is adorable in her little shorts~ and she says that she thinks she and Byleth have similar personalities. That's interesting. Anyway, people think she's distant or arrogant or whatever but she's gonna be Emperor, bitch

Hubert has served Edelgard since she was a child, which makes sense because I'm pretty sure he is at least 45. No lie, when I saw him in Fire Emblem: Heroes, I just assumed that he was one of the teachers.

Ferdinand thinks he's Edelgard's rival, and his family are the Prime Ministers of Adrestia. He's cute, but he fidgets around in the little scene like he is terribly bored of it.

Linhardt is intelligent but disinterested, except in napping. He is entirely dismissive of him as a human being. He has a very weird haircut and I thought he was a girl.

Caspar is a second son, so he has to earn whatever he's going to get. He's a little reckless and very energetic and might need babysitting. He seems cute!

Bernadetta is a weird shut-in. We can all relate to that. Edelgard promises to make her go to classes. Her outfit is very cute, which surprised me, because just her headshot makes her look kind of like she's wearing a shapeless blob.

Dorothea is the only peasant who was allowed into the upper echelon of Black Eagle House. She's a singer from a famous opera company. I assume she's met our famous opera singer professor. Dorothea is super pretty.

Petra is the granddaughter of a king from some tiny vassal state of the Empire. She's smart, and also very pretty.

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I spoke to everyone, so I wandered back into the audience chamber, where Seteth tells me it's time to pick a house, even if Byleth is unqualified and untrustworthy! Professors Manuela and Hanneman are graciously willing to give Byleth first pick, since she's new, which settles my concern that it doesn't make sense she gets to choose her own house if she's filling in the one empty slot.

Urghhhh fine

Can't I just play all three houses at once? How about two?

Bleh

I felt some sort of obligation to pick Edelgard first, since she was given the starring role in the trailer that made me need this game, and her plotline is hypothetically the most interesting. (I have heard it described as "Suikoden-like". That warms my heart.)

But... I am interested in everyone in Dimitri's house, whereas I'm only interested in about half of Edelgard and Claude's houses, so... fine! Blue Lion House.

The Blue Lions are astonished to see their new professor! Annette flounders about how shockingly casual she was with a professor, and when Byleth suggests they speak to her like a friend, Dimitri is like, BUT... YOU ARE... A PROFESSOR, THOUGH??

SYLVAIN: We're already talking this way with our future king, so... why be more formal with a professor.

Dimitri is so uncomfortable, but he'll allow it. Ingrid isn't sure if she is literally capable of being casual with a professor. Byleth is okay with that if that's important to her!

SYLVAIN: Such a benevolent professor! I don't suppose you would care to join me for tea?
SYLVAIN: We could discuss education... and marriage.

lol are you really that interested in marriage, playboy.

Anyway, Felix is like, SHUT UP SYLVAIN, FIRST SHE MUST DUEL ME. Everyone else piles on, although Sylvain puts up a cursory sulk about how fighting isn't the best way to bond. No, marriage proposals should come first!

Hanneman wants to know what Crest Byleth has, and when she doesn't know, is delighted to have the chance to fanboy about them at her. They are True Runes, but usually passed down by bloodline.

His invisible device (shhh don't ask questions) displays an image that Hanneman is shocked to realize he doesn't know. AN UNDISCOVERED CREST?!?!?

Anyway, gtfo, he's going to be mumbling to himself and researching this now, your presence is no longer required.

The game explains to me how the monastery scheduling system works, which seems neat. On Byleth's days off she can explore and do stuff, and then during the week she comes up with lesson plans, and sometimes there are special seminars, etc. Today is 4/27, so our first proper month will begin in May. I mean, whatever month comes fifth, after Great Tree Moon.

Before then, we're going to have a mock battle between the houses! Obviously, I will win. Sorry, other houses!

First of all, having played this game all last night and now going back to record things, I am comfortable saying that the monastery is too fucking big. I mean, I know it has to have a ton of areas. But every area should be like 30% less open space, and then we'd all be better off.

Hubert makes a joke about having Byleth murdered if she keeps bugging him. "...I'm joking, of course." You're bad at it. HELP I NEED AN ADULT

There are dogs around now in addition to cats, but the dogs are jerks and keep barking at me.

Some extremely dramatic antisocial man named Jeritza is here now, and an old monk named Tomas.

It's the day of the mock battle! The boys are cheerful about it, Edelgard will eat you for breakfast.

After the Blue Lions victory, Dimitri has everyone head out to a victory celebration, to which Byleth seems somewhat surprised to be invited. After the others leave, Dimitri wants to know why Byleth doesn't seem too happy about her victory...? And tells her that he wants her to be able to enjoy happiness with them while we can. I have a feeling you're right about that, pal.

Next month, our mission is to take out some bandits -- a real fight, not a practice battle.

RHEA: I can sense something special within your heart.
(two seconds later)
SOTHIS, INSIDE BYLETH'S HEART: Bandits, huh?

Byleth is startled to hear Sothis -- it's been a week or two, I guess, since she heard from her passenger. But Sothis is sticking around until we figure out what her deal is, probably!

The bandits are the same losers who were stalking the students, and their leader Kostas is annoyed -- he wasn't told that the Knights of Seiros would be involved if he attacked the students.

His patron, a weird armored dude with a red and white mask and feathers, is very dismissive of him and his problems, but interested in the situation with Byleth -- child of the former captain of the knights, a mercenary that Rhea immediately made a professor. What's up with that?

BANDIT: Hey! I'm talking to you! How do we finish this?
ARMORED DUDE: You die.

"The road to eternal torment awaits you all." Uh, okay, dramatic much. Then he disappears, leaving Kostas to fume.

Jeralt likes it if Byleth is having trouble adjusting! You're a bad dad. He admits that as mercenaries, he basically handled everything, and Byleth didn't have much contact with people. Suddenly being thrown into teaching a bunch of noble brats is a big jump.

Lady Rhea won't allow him to support Byleth on this mission, which... I guess might not be a weird thing, although it sure sounds weird for a second.

JERALT: I don't mind you settling into your life here, but don't let your guard down.
JERALT: Ever.

Jeez, Jeralt, don't be so coy with your feelings about this place. Do you like it or not?!

5/11, a free day in Harpstring Moon. Claude is jealous and Dimitri is concerned about our fancy real world bandit assignment.

Dedue warns me that if I'm seen with a "man of Duscur" (Duscurian?) there will be rumors. Well, uh, I'm still teaching you, so.

FELIX: The boar prince and I have been inseparable for years -- maybe since birth.
FELIX: So let me give you a warning. Under his princely exterior, he's an animal.
FELIX: He's strong and skilled. But don't place your trust in him as a human being.
FELIX: Take care he doesn't chew you up and spit you out.

Okay, that's a weird thing to say, wow. You're... you're his best friend, huh? I mean, I've seen his post-timeskip artwork, and "animalistic" might be a good way to describe it, but.

New person Shamir is here, and she looks awesome, and also she thinks Byleth looks familiar, idk. Also, some random kid named Cyril, who also thinks someone looks familiar.

Byleth is definitely going to wake up one day to find that Hanemann has chained her to a sacrificial altar, but until then, I just keep giving him blood and hair samples and stuff.

We're about to head out to murder some bandits! The students are overall excited, and although Dimitri is more cautious, he's excited at the opportunity to maybe see Byleth fight together with Knight Captain Jeralt! We were told he's not coming, though. Mostly, he is jealous that she has a dad around. His parents... aren't around anymore, you see...

Whoa, now isn't the time for backstory! Let's fight some bandits.

After the bandits are deaded, Byleth mulls over the Red Canyon. She remembers it somehow... even though she's never been here before. But Sothis has some strange, powerful emotional reaction to it, despite not remembering why. And perhaps Byleth finds it familiar because Sothis finds it familiar. Iiiinteresting.

Dimitri comes up while she's communing with her headvoices, and we go back. We encounter Edelgard on her way out as we're coming in, and Dimitri calls out to her, and Edelgard does not appreciate his concern, which she interprets as a lack of faith. Manuela gives him a headpat and takes off after her.

She's Just Not That Into You

Rhea approves of our ass-kicking, but wonders why the bandits went there in the first place... The Red Canyon, aka Zanado, is a holy site where a goddess descended. It's part of the teachings of Seiros, but Byleth is like, iunno!, and Rhea is sad that Daddy never told her any of this.

Sothis muses in Byleth's head that the goddess stuff sounds familiar... Maybe she was there when the goddess was? But that was a long time ago, so then why is she still alive? And why is she in Byleth?

She starts anxiously wondering if maybe she's a ghost, chained to this realm because of regrets, and she gets very agitated about it no definitely not that

It's a new month: June aka Garland Moon.

There are reports that Lord Lonato of Faergus is rebelling against the church of Seiros. Knights are already en route to his stronghold, Castle Gaspar, and his military forces are probably garbage so we're not concerned about them, but Rhea wants the Blue Lions to travel with the rear guard (led by badass lady knight Catherine) and just make sure the aftermath is going well.

RHEA: This mission should prove useful in demonstrating to the students how foolish it would be to turn against the church. :)

Uh...huh. Cool, sounds good.